One of the serious diseases that has been eating our generation for ages is backbiting. Presently, large numbers of people have come to normalize it in their day-to-day interactions. In fact, it is the order of the day.
Backbiting is uttering bad things about a person who is not present. In other words, it is an unpleasant and unkind talk about somebody in his or her absence; or to simply put it, talking about somebody which if he hears it will grieve him; often times mortally.
Today, majority of the people are not aware that they are falling into the sin of backbiting. For them, they are innocently sharing some pieces of information they have heard or telling someone another person’s wrong doings that may or may not have affected them personally.
Our offices, chambers, houses, business places, learning environments, occasions and ceremonies have sadly become some sorts of rendezvous of backbiting today. Even our hallowed places of worship are not spared! One must dance according to the tune if s/he doesn’t want to be called uncivilized by those who engage in such an sinful act.
It needs repeating that it is also common at holy places to see such an immoral habit. People usually gather either in mosque or church to talk about someone in his absence. At times, even the religious ones engage in this practice not forgetting that they urge people to desist from it as a religious injunction.
Backbiting is wholly bad in Islam and Christianity and they strongly warn and condemn it. Dr. Ibrahim Siraj Adhama of Sasif Friday Mosque expounded its causes and how Islam wholeheartedly prohibites it in an exclusive interview with him.
“Backbiting is, indeed, a very bad habit and so should be totally avoided. In an Islamic perspective, Allah, the Almighty, has strongly condemned it in Qur’an 49:12, where He says: O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions; indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the one who forgives and accepts repentance, the Most Merciful. “
Talking about someone in his absence is like eating the flesh of someone’s dead brother which obviously everybody hates. It is a horrible sin. If a person is present, he may have a chance to defend himself, but in such situation, he doesn’t as it happens in his absence. When a person commits a sin, Allah may forgive him if he repents but Allah will not forgive the one who backbites till the victim forgives him.
Similarly, Reverend E. A. Onojo of United Evangelical Church of Nigeria firmly stated that Christianity does not support any form of backbiting and, it is one of the Ten Commandments that says “You should not testify false accusation against your brothers. And it is a great sin that what you cannot testify in the presence of anyone, is not good to say in his absence. If it happens that you say such a thing against anyone, then you have committed a great offence.”
He also added that backbiting is a form of betraying your brother’s confidence, because the moment you are criticizing him/her, it simply means you are tarnishing his/her image in the eyes of people. “If, as a Christian practice, we get hold of such person, s/he can face the music of discipline in a form of suspension so that s/he can learn a lesson.”
Backbiting is not done by tongue alone. It can also be done by eyes, hands, and other movements. For example, copying somebody who is limping in order to insult him is a form of backbiting.
It is also imperative to note that backbiting a child, a mad person or a disbeliever is not allowed in both religions; and listening to backbiting is the same as backbiting somebody. However, there are some statements that are not considered as backbiting:
1- To complain to a father or husband about his child or wife respectively who can possibly reform them.
2- To complain to a person about cruel official so that the concerned official can discipline the cruel one.
3- To describe something to save a believer from religious victimization
To state the exact character of someone when it comes to a marriage issue.
Since backbiting is as disgusting as eating one’s flesh, we should therefore not backbite. If one backbites or we hear somebody backbiting, we should not join them. We should either correct them or discourage them by smartly changing the topic of discussion or by taking our leave.
It is religiously impermissible to talk about somebody in his absence even if what is being narrated is true. Thus, one must be aware that, if what is narrated is not true, it becomes be a bigger sin which is called false accusation.
Let us now meditate thoroughly about all the talks we do in respect of others in their absence which we do not want them to hear.
Thus, we must know that backbiting violates the rights of Allah and the rights of people simultaneously. It is crucial for one to ask forgiveness from the victim first, since Allah will not forgive unless the victim forgives. And if the victim is dead or untraceable, then ransom has to be paid.
What exactly is the ransom of backbiting? It is to pray to your Lord for forgiveness by saying “Oh God, forgive my sin and his too.”
We should not at any cost backbite one another because it is a bad habit and it ruins the peaceful coexistence and relationship with others; neighbours, colleagues or relatives alike. It separates people from one another. It is great enemy of society today as it causes enmity within a family. May Allah save us from such an evil act Ameen!
Usman Usman Garba,
Kano
08069771400
; usmangarba100@ gmail.com
