Yuletide is also referred to as the Christmas season. However, it is a period when some relationships usually break up due to some reasons; TOPE SUNDAY writes.
Segun and Funmi are good friends. Their friendship was expected to metamorphose into marriage because it was long awaited. However, one good afternoon in December, to everyone’s amazement, the relationship of several years shattered at a click of a button with just an SMS message, saying that: “I am sorry, this relationship can’t go beyond here.”
Like Segun and Funmi’s story which started and ended in Ilorin, the Kwara state capital, investigations by Blueprint Weekend revealed that many relationships come to a bitter end during the yuletide over issues ranging from the pressure to take the relationship to the next level; opportunity to end a struggling relationship; to the resolve by men not to spend money on their girls/fiancées during the period.
Need to take relationships to next level
An Ilorin-based journalist, Ishola Gbenga, who narrated the love story between Segun and Fumni to this medium, identified Segun as his childhood friend. He said their relationship ended on Christmas day. According to him, Funmi called it quits because of what her prophet told her.
He said Funmi had approached a prophet over the relationship and in return told her that her marriage to Segun is not ‘endorsed’ by God, lamenting that the age-long relationship was scattered because of prophecy.
Gbenga said: “Segun and Funmi were good friends. Their friendship was expected to metamorphose into a meaningful relationship with a strong prospect of walking to the altar in no distance time. To everyone’s amazement, a relationship of several years became shattered at a click of a button which took just a few words of an SMS message to say “I am sorry; this relationship can’t go beyond here.”
“Why? We asked ourselves, but the response to that only one, but salient question came after several prodding to fathom what really went wrong. It was during Christmas celebration, precisely on Christmas day, at a time when usually the spirit is always high in the village, to mingle, associate and jolly together with friends and families, then came a text message which ordinarily one expects that such a text, especially coming from your fiancée would wish you happy Christmas but reverse became the case.
“On that amazing afternoon, we were pounding yam in the village when Funmi spoilt the celebration for Segun. She had sent a text to Segun telling him the relationship is over. Segun gave the phone to me. I read through and suddenly became dumb. Segun lost his appetite instantly. I shared in his yet- to- be fathomed situation and for that day, we both did not eat from that pounded yam.
“We left the scene for another cool environment. For someone who had no quarrel or misunderstanding with his fiancée, such news is, indeed, a bad one. The disorganised Segun and I put a call through to Funmi at least to hear from the horse’s mouth, but she ignored and didn’t return any of our calls. With such a situation at hand, I became an emissary. I left the village for Ilorin to visit Iyabo who is Funmi’s close friend to help intervene as I took time to narrate all that transpired to her (Iyabo).
“At the end, Funmi made it clear that her prophet actually told her there’s no way in that relationship, adding that the courage to tell Segun one-on-one was what she actually lost at that time. But we felt that (1) such issues shouldn’t be sent via SMS. (2) That such shouldn’t even be sent on Christmas day when the mood was glamorous.”
Opportunity to end struggling relationships
Findings by this reporter further revealed that most of the relationships come to an abrupt end during the season because some partners are tired of their struggling relationships. According to Gift Friday, her experience almost sent her to the early grave. She said, her ex-lover, who she identified as Thomas, ended their three-year relationship a week to Christmas day in 2019. Gift, who claimed to have moved on with her life, said the development destabilised her, but expressed gratitude to God for being her strength.
“My ex-boy, Thomas, who had promised me heaven and earth, suddenly told me a week to Christmas in 2019 that he was no longer interested in our three-year relationship. I thought he was joking until I discovered he was damn serious. I managed to ask him what the problem was, and he told me that he was trying to cope but he could not continue to pretend.
“At that moment, I discovered that I had just wasted three years of my life in a relationship that I also invested so heavenly in. I managed to speak with some of my ex’s friends to help me pacify him but their responses were that he told them that he didn’t expect that our relationship would last for three years. And that was the reason he ended it in December so that it will not snowball into the new year.”
The money-related break-ups
Money is one of the causes of separation of two lovers during the yuletide season. According to findings by Blueprint Weekend, some of the relationships are intentionally ended because of money.
The findings also revealed that men are usually responsible for the breakups over their inability to provide for the needs of their female partners during the period. Also, while some are willing to pick up the bills of their female partners during the period, others have reportedly resolved not to pick up their partners’ bills and are ready to end the relationship.
A resident of Abuja, Adeyemi Alabi, told this medium that few weeks to the season, he usually stops dating any lady because he wants to cater for his family who are domiciled in Lagos. According to him, he cannot sacrifice his family’s comfort during the season for any lady.
He said: “I am a married man and my family stays in Lagos. I cherish my family so much and I am not ready to sacrifice their comfort and pleasure during the yuletide for anybody. As you know, Christmas season consumes a lot of money, and in view of the current situation in the country, I usually stop any relationship I am into a few weeks to the Christmas season to enable me to attend to the needs of my family.”
Also, 29-year-old Frederic Samson told this reporter that he was not ready to spend wastefully during the yuletide season on any relationship that he is not sure of where it is heading to. He said the season consumes a lot of money, and asked who among his girls should he spend lavishly on?
“By my observation, the Christmas season consumes a lot of money and because of this, I am not ready to spend lavishly on any lady during this period. I have made up my mind that I will not spend money on any of my girls during the period because I am not sure of where our relationships are heading to. Also, among them who will I spend for? I am not ready for that and usually, I don’t date during the season because it requires money to please your partner,” he said.
